financial fear

Holy Shizz…Am I Really Doing This? (Facing My Fear of Investing in Myself)

I’ve made a lot of big investments over the life of my career.

Each time, I was scared to death.

The first was when I was still a lawyer in a big law firm and while I was making a nice, steady, reliable paycheck, I NEVER spent any money on myself.

And, after taxes, insurance, mortgage payments, stuff for the baby, and my husband’s daily trips to Starbucks with the baby (he was a stay at home dad), there was nothing left over.

So how COULD I start investing in myself?

I didn’t think I could.

That changed when I came across my very first coach and realized that if I didn’t hire her and get help, I was going to be stuck in misery.

I had worked my buttinski off to get the job at the big law firm and yet there I was with all the “success” in the world and I wanted to die every day I had to leave my husband and baby to go into the office.

Fortunately, I came across a coach I knew could help me (how I came across her is a really good story for another day), but I was scared to make the investment.

Spend money on myself? Never.

But after some conversation with her, she helped me to see that if I didn’t make investments in myself (not just financial, but other investments too — more about that another day as well), I’d be stuck.

And if I did make investments in myself, they would pay back every time.

So I did it. I took a deep breath, swallowed hard and paid her more money than I thought I had for coaching. And it wasn’t even that much.

But back then, it felt like so much. (It was only $347/mo., but it felt like a million dollars because I was SURE I didn’t have the extra $347/mo.)

And it’s all relative …

Just a few years later in 2008, I invested $100,000 (yes, you read that right!) to participate in a coaching/mastermind program.

$100,000!?!  But I’m telling ya, it truly is all relative.

That $347/mo. investment felt as scary as the $100,000 investment.

My businesses were on track to make a couple million and anything less than $100,000 wouldn’t have been enough to stretch me beyond my comfort zone at that point.

And that’s exactly where I needed to be.

Stretched.

Outside my comfort zone.

Today, I am right back there again … about to make a huge investment that is scaring me to death. Stretching

But it’s definitely the right next thing. I’ll share the details of it with you tomorrow and how I know it’s the next right stretch for me.

To your eyes (and heart) wide open life,

Ali

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