Burning Man

Burning Co-Dependence at Burning Man

These love letters are my raw and real direct communication just for those of you who are part of the Eyes Wide Open community by choice.  While there are business lessons you can receive in this long letter, this is not business, it’s personal. So many of you responded to last week’s love letter and I am so grateful that so many of you want to hear more about how I’ve come to handle many of the challenges and gifts I’ve been offered throughout this life.

I strongly desire to spend a lot more of my time making love to you through my creative heart than I do selling you things.

I am still deciding which to start with, so if you have a preference, please send me a message (alexis@eyeswideopenlife.com) and let me know. If you didn’t get the email, you can read the message here.

My intention at Burning Man this year was to discover how I can have “adult fun”, meaning that I can remain in my adult and still have fun. In years past, I was really living my fully-embodied teenager, but quite often my adult was nowhere to be seen. Except when it came to business.  When it came to business, my adult was fully online and she was definitely NOT fun.

So, as I step into the integration of my parts — Ali Shanti and Alexis Neely and everyone in between — my exploration is how I can have adult fun, and not just the kind that happens behind closed doors, but truly and completely live my maturity and have a great time while I do it.

It turns out that one way I can do that is to completely and totally let go of codependent patterns that have held me back from living my full truth for a very long time. Can you relate?

If so, here’s a post I wrote as I left Burning Man without my honey (who now has the Playa name of Pimp Lion, yes that’s right Pimp Lion — you’ll see what I mean when you see his picture) that lets you in on one stage of co-dependence burning away.

What I didn’t say there, but I will tell you here (because this is where you get the most raw and the most real that I have to offer) is that Pimp Lion (as he shall now be referred to forever more) showed me the path to releasing codependence when we went to a “play party” together and he left before it even started.

I made you a quite edgy video (20-minutes) that won’t be shared anywhere besides here about how that experience of him leaving me at the play party alone was the path to ending our codependence, I hope for good.

If you’d like to read about Michael’s experience of what’s happened since we’ve been home, you can do so here. I’m looking forward to sharing more of what’s coming through as it does. Big, beautiful shifts, recognizing addiction and codependence and becoming free, together.

And for a public video about the whole Burning Man experience (10-minutes) that began as a Periscope and answering the question about whether Burning Man is worth it and, if so, why. In it, I share the 5 main things I discovered about why we make this pilgrimage to the desert each year.

One last thing about my personal Burning Man experience … a few years ago when I first began to redefine what success meant to me, after I had “made it” in the traditional sense and found it empty, I discovered that I would feel most successful if/when I was in my body, feeling sexy, and dancing, specifically on stage at Burning Man.  Well, this is now the third year it happened.

You can see a picture and description of the dance here. Before reading the description, can you tell which “life reflection” I was dancing by the look on my face in the image? Video to come.


I’m deep in creative development of a few things I hope to share with you soon, including my next book (I signed on with a fantastic agent, so excited!), a show I hope to launch in November (could be January), a REALLY big project for Burning Man next year (message me asap if you might want to bring your parents to Burning Man) and of course the fully integrated rebrand/reconstruction of Alexis Neely/Ali Shanti.

And through it all, taking the New Law Business Model, Eyes Wide Open Collective and my personal relationships with my honey and my kids to the next level.  Whew, that’s a lot. And, I’m grateful to be able to experience it all and share as much of it with you as possible.

Next week, I am hoping to share more about how Michael and I are moving through relationship. It’s suprising me to no end. I asked him to move out last week, which he did. And it’s brought us closer together than ever.  Who knew boundaries, when shared cleanly and clearly and from a place of total love, could feel so good?

Love to you,

Ali xoxo