Desire, and knowing what you need, is a hot topic these days. Everyone wants it.  But, most of the people I talk to who are struggling in ways that feel insurmountable or who are simply stuck in a so-so situation are trapped by one common denominator — they don’t truly know what they want.

For many people, knowing what you want is one step too far away. You cannot possibly focus on what you want if you don’t yet you know you have what you need.

If you are stuck in survival mode, which means that at some level you are nearly constantly believing you are in a battle to provide enough for yourself and your family (even if you have a high income or a big retirement account), the question of what you want is likely nearly completely shrouded by your perceived need to survive.

Your wants are hidden behind the things you believe you have to do to provide. It’s dangerous to consider what you actually want because the likelihood of having it feels so slim that you just keep doing “the thing you need to do” to survive and go through life either in some form of conflict and struggle or in an apathetic, lethargic malaise, fueled by sugar, coffee, marijuana and wine. Or both and all of it.

So what keeps people stuck in survival mode and unable to move beyond the paradigm of conflict/struggle and apathy/lethargy into a paradigm of ease, grace and abundance?

Many things, without question, but one that I’ve seen again and again and again, is what I refer to as “money dysmorphia”, which I define as the distortion that appears around money when you don’t know what you need.

When you don’t know how much you need, it really doesn’t matter how much you have because you’ll still be in survival mode, trying to get as much as you can, well after you have more than enough.

Why? Is it because you are greedy? No.

People who experience money dysmorphia (most people!) simply have a blind spot. You look in your bank account, at your retirement, at your savings and say “I don’t have enough” and I can promise you this, when Money Dysmorphia is running the show, it’s never enough. You could work yourself to death chasing that financial freedom and it will always be just out of reach.

But when that blind spot is illuminated by seeing what you actually need to survive, your mind will relax, stop spinning and sabotaging you and allow you to know what you really want.

Knowing what you want is the key to it all.

I’d venture to say that there has never been a time in your life where you truly knew what you wanted, acknowledged what you wanted, and did not find a way to create it in your life or watch it magically show up.

It’s a Universal Law and when it is honored, it is affirmed everywhere you look. In contrast, when it is not honored, you can oh so easily see the exact opposite — not enough of anything and no way out.

If that’s where you are now, begin to step into the awareness of what you actually need to have the life you want. Then, if you discover you are already there, relax, revel, slow down and celebrate.  And, if you discover you are not, create a plan to meet your needs. Stop undercharging or giving away your services for free, and ask for what you really need in exchange for what you have to give.

Heal your money dysmorphia once and for all by getting into right relationship with time, money and how you get paid. And before you waste any more time trying to figure out what you want, make sure you know that you’ve got what you need.

I guess my main question is; what path are you on now and where do you want to go next?

Here is to your liberated life, with your heart and eyes wide open.

All my love,

Ali

xoxo

PS — We are launching a Live Version of Money Map, maybe you’ve heard about this in my Love Letter. If not, be sure to check out our Money Map Program page for more information, and sign up for more information on this launch 🙂